Chuck Norris是美国的一个现象，如同许纯美是中国台湾的现象，巴士阿叔是中国香港的现象，芙蓉姐姐和145是中国大陆的现象。
这个人在一个肥皂剧中的做作的演出，导致了一个网络好事者写了一篇有名的文章：“Top 100 facts about Chuck Norris”，全面地讽刺了Chuck Norris的武功、霸气还有性能力。于是他出名了，故事的高潮是某天一个脱口秀节目中，Chuck Norris自己念出了这100条里他最喜欢的10条——请注意，他半真半假地觉得人家是在捧他，笑的很开心……
全文如下：
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Top 100 facts about Chuck Norris
1. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. Ever.
Chuck Norris的眼泪能治癌，可惜的是他从来不哭。
2. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris从来不睡觉。他等待着。
3. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
Chuck Norris现在正在起诉NBC，声称“法律”和“秩序”只不过是他左右腿的商标而已。
4. The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
Chuck Norris的主要出口产品是痛苦。
5. If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
如果你能看到Chuck Norris，那Chuck Norris也能看到你。如果你不能看到Chuck Norris，那你离死不远了。
* 在Chuck Norris的电视剧中，结尾曲有句歌词大意是“那些做坏事的人小心了，Chuck Norris正看着你！”
6. Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.
Chuck Norris从一数到了无穷。两次
7. Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
Chuck Norris从来不去“狩猎”，因为“狩猎”这个词暗示有可能失败。Chuck Norris直接去“杀”。
8. Chuck Norris doesn’t wash his clothes, he disembowels them.
Chuck Norris从来不洗衣服。他直接把它们撕开。
*撕开衣服是猛男打架的前兆。
9. Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a f***ing Indian.
Chuck Norris有1/8的Cherokee血统。这和他的祖先无关——这个家伙吃掉了一个他吗的印地安人。
*Cherokee是印第安人一支。
10. In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.
精装版吉尼斯世界纪录大全的最后一页上特别注明，所有的吉尼斯世界纪录其实都是由Chuck Norris保持的，这本书上记载的只不过是那些最接近他的人而已
11. There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
Chuck Norris的胡子后面其实没有下巴，那里只有另外一个拳头。
* Chuck Norris的胡子被视为他的“猛男”特征之一。
12. Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over thePacific Ocean.
Chuck Norris有一次用Roundhouse踢人的时候太猛了，以至于他的脚超过光速，时光旅行回到过去，然后杀掉了正在太平洋上空飞行的Amelia Earhart。
*1 roundhouse踢是Chuck Norris的绝招，下同。
*2 Amelia Earhart是20世纪30年代环球飞行时死亡的女性。
13. Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the f*** down.
“麦圈”现象其实是Chuck Norris想要表达“你们这些麦子就他吗的给我倒呀！”的意思而已。
* 麦圈，灵异现象爱好者眼中的“世界之迷”之一。有人说麦圈是他们的恶作剧，但是这个说法并不被爱好者接受。
14. Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.
Chuck Norris10英尺高，2吨重，吐火，能吃锤子，被霰弹枪击中而不倒。
15. The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.
长城的建立其实是为了阻挡Chuck Norris。它悲惨地失败了。
16. If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'till." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
如果你问Chuck Norris现在几点了，他会回答“两秒，直到”。当你问“两秒直到什么？”的时候，他一个roundhouse踢在你脸上……
17. Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.
Chuck Norris驾驶着盖满了骷髅头的冰激凌汽车上。
*冰激凌汽车会放好听的小孩子音乐，到处开，卖冰激凌，车上一般涂着卡通形象。
18. Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse-kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
Chuck Norris把他的灵魂卖给了恶魔，以换取他那刚毅的形象，和无以比拟的肌肉能力。在交易结束之后不久，Chuck一个roundhouse踢在恶魔脸上，然后拿回了他的灵魂。那个恶魔却不晓得为什么很感激，发不起来火，并且承认他早该想到会是这样。现在他们两个每个月的第二个周三都在一起打扑克。
19. There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
世界上其实没有进化论。只有一张Chuck Norris允许活下来的生物的列表”
20. Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.
Chuck Norris某日花一小时时间一次吃掉了三个72盎司的牛排。他在（这一小时的）一开始的45分钟之内都在和女佣搞 作者: 错乱僧 时间: 2012-9-6 14:03
